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Love, Sex and Relationship Advice > Shame About My Shape

I was very happy to hear that Today show TV host Kathie Lee, when she returned to TV years ago after her baby, joke when she was with Regis about what's between her breasts now -- her belly button! My breasts are big and they've always been saggy like that too. When I was 10, the other girls in school used to make fun of me. Now I'm shapely, but I'm overall "full figured," with big hips and thighs, too. I'm so ashamed, I haven't ever gotten fully nude in front of my man and prefer to keep something on during sex. Is there something wrong with me?

September 1, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSelfConscious

Nearly every woman is dissatisfied with her body. Eight out of ten women in America feel too fat -- starting from fourth grade! Over half diet. The dissatisfaction costs women self esteem and over 50 billion dollars a year on the diet, fitness, cosmetics and plastic surgery industries. Not surprisingly, surveys show most women hate big hips and thighs (called the "Venus syndrome)," then their rear-end and breasts. For your poor beleaguered breasts, short of plastic surgery for breast reduction if they're painfully large, do upper body exercises to tighten the suspensory muscles. Everyone should do brain exercises to change bad attitudes! Don't fall victim to the "beauty myth" thinking you have to mimic skin-and-bones Lindsay Lohan, or model Kate Moss, whose emaciated figure was lambasted by many mental health professionals in a People magazine article. After many liposuctions and obsessive working-out, even Cher has reportedly given up the endless pursuit of a slim ideal, and gained over twenty pounds. Model, and TV host Tyra Banks let her body go “natural.” Turn your "body loathing" into "body love" by making peace with and loving your breasts and full figure. Forget the past -- kids taunt each other mercilessly. Kim Basinger was teased as a child over her lips and grew to hate them. Look at your nude self in a full length mirror. Neutralize criticisms ("my stomach is flabby" becomes "my stomach skin is nice and soft"). Focus on positive parts ("I love being curvy"). Feel special. I'm glad Kathie Lee's confession gives you reassurance you're not alone, but don't compare -- to sisters, friends, or models. Even Hollywood's beauties don't see themselves as beautiful. Brooke Shields has said "I'm nothing extraordinary to myself." Another woman's body was attached to Julia Roberts' face for the poster of the hit movie "Pretty Woman," so what real woman could ever be "pretty" enough? The extreme of body loathing is a disorder where people imagine themselves ugly when they're not. The ugliness they see outside is really a reflection of "ugly" inner feelings. Get that inner self in shape and then reveal both it -- and your outer self -- to men!

September 1, 2009 | Registered CommenterDr. Judy Kuriansky

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December 7, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterYoly D. Craig